Froggy Writings

Shhh

I hopped in my car tonight
Heading east
Just trying to get out of this small town
All I found along the way
Were signs of frustration
Nothing but detours and exits
All leading back here
Why can't I get away from you
I see that smile every where I goI wanted you then
And I want you now
But I don't know if what I want
Is what's best for you

Hmmm

In spite of what you said
I may be better off dead

Instead of living here with you
I could live in a world where everything wasn't blue

These things that I think and say
Are the emotions that help me struggle through another day

Everything within me wants to break free
Going along without everybody's sympathy

Trying to stay honest and be true
Not to myself because I have nothing left to lose

I do not understand why this doesn't post under the date. Does anyone know?

I am going to try to keep this up dated again. I now work 14 hrs on Saturday so I am sure I can at least update on those days if nothing else.

I am working at a dealership here in Yukon. I work M-F 3:30-9:00 and Saturday I come in at 8:00am and work until 9:00pm. I hate this but I have to say I get a lot done. I have a very laid back job. I wear jeans and a t-shirt almost everyday. I was told that it was ok until the general manager said something. He is nice and doesn't seem to care so I don't see that changing. I go to class MWF 8:00am-1:00pm. I did this originally to have tow days off of school but with gas prices I am glad I did this now with an hour of driving to get there and back. I am still taking my basics I don't feel like I will ever get done with school but as long as I keep going I am getting closer. I am taking: Family and Marriage, Nutrition, Math for General Education, Sociology.

On top of all of this I am doing mystery shopping too. I enjoy this to a point but it also becomes a lot to do.

I am also in a relationship with a guy named Mike we've been dating almost 2 yrs. It will be 2 yrs in December. We don't see each other as much as we would like but it is how we have to do it. He usually comes out on Wednesday nights and we go to dinner after I get off work. Then we spend Sundays together. I usually drive the 30 miles out to his house every Sunday. Some Sundays we have to do something for one of my classes but he has been pretty easy going with this. I had to volunteer at the Red Cross for sociology and he went with me and volunteered also. I feel he does his best to understand that I am trying my best to do all I can.

Saturdays are long days for me but I make it through them. I am able to play on the internet at work which helps with the time. The internet gets boring though too. They have a cow when I ask off tow Saturday. I have asked off tow Saturdays in a row in October and I don't think they will give me off both of them. I am and going to ask about it again this week.

"That's A Pretty Sweet Bike"

Death is often just as complicated as life. Even though dying is really the simple polar quality of the expression, getting to that point is really the most challenging part. And that is really the only important underlining factor. To get to death, you have to live through life. Breathing has never been harder.

Well not much is going on. I am working, going to school and trying to find time for relationships and homework all at the same time. I don't get on the internet that much anymore it has just become more work then anything but I am sure that will change with school being back in and all. Nothing really big has been going on. I pretty much don't have time for big things. Jeff just woke up and I have to feed him now. I will try to update more often. Bye

Where To Go From Here?

This is the way it always happens. I come up with this great idea for a post or maybe something I write just turns out to be a good post in general. I post it. It's a hit. But, then the next time my mind wanders onto the notion of writing, I run into a well known problem, bam... I cannot come up with anything. It happens all the time. You wouldn't believe how much pressure it is to write. Or maybe you would. My days are long and the nights take ever longer to get through. That sounds so depressive doesn't it? I've got some things to do and some errands to run before I go to work tomorrow. My next day off is Thursday. It can't come soon enough. I need rest. Don't hate me...

the post modern faith?

"i oppose abortion, personally, i don't like abortion. i believe life does begin at conception. but i can't take my catholic belief, my article of faith, and legislate it on a protestant or a jew or an atheist ...who doesn't share it. we have separation of church and state in the united states of america." -john kerry

i ussually don't write anything political here on my journal. honestly i feel no true need to, after all there are very many political writers out there, and politics are politics...i am to live my life to the laws of the land and live out my life serving Christ until He takes me home, and sometimes christians do more harm in ministry than good in the political arena...becoming merly political blocs that politicans try to gain votes from.

but this comment from presidental hopeful john kerry struck me, and one i have heard recently from many other individuals. the concept of 'my belief' and that should not interfer with how they act out in their occupication. since the strong convictions of president bush this debate has gotten stronger and stronger, and come to the point that ron reagan for example will go out and attack a man for how he practices his faith as his own fathers funeral.

our beliefs naturally affect who we are and how we approach issues in life. if they don't, we truely do not believe in them. as a musician, i believe that music should be fun and exciting, that it should pop out and fill us up with joy. that belief carries with me in all areas of life dealing with music. do i 'impose' that particular belief on others? no, but i share it with others and express it in my own music. it is a belief, and it shows in my life.

as a christian, that is, a person that has accepted Christ as personal Lord and Savior, and therefore being filled by the Holy Spirt am a new creature, i have not just a set of beliefs such as i do with music...but something so much more. it isn't just faith, something i believe on a wild guess...but a inward conviction. Christ lives in me now, and my whole exsistence needs to reflect that of Christ. it isn't just a mere opinion, it is a living reality that i experience each and every day. because i am a born again christian everything i do reflects my new life in Christ. my faith shapes my beliefs, and how i carry them out. my faith shapes my beliefs in music, in clothing, in relationships, and in my political beliefs. it's not 'imposing' my faith on someone else, it is expressing the Spirit within me in just another aspect of my life.

it saddens me to read comments such as john kerry's. attempting to be everything to everyone he is becoming nothing to noone. if john kerry truely saw something wrong about abortion...not just because he is catholic, but because he has a belief, a inward conviction, he would have expressed it by now in his thirty years of public serivce. if he has the belief that he cannot impose his beliefs and legislate them on others, how could he have written any law? he believes that our air should be clean, but can he impose that belief on me if i believe otherwise? according to his statement no.

i don't know how this debate will end up in the united states government. and honestly it doesn't matter, because God is in full and complete control. as a believer i have a mandate to share the name of Jesus Christ to everyone i can and the love that he has for each one of us. even to those i disagree with politically, spiritually, and so forth. michael moore needs Jesus. john kerry needs Jesus. dick cheney needs Jesus. rush limbaugh needs Jesus.

see a pattern here?

america needs Jesus.